The 85 year old widow

The funeral parlor called the 85 year old widow to tell her that her 90 year old husband had died with such a massive erection that he could not close the lid of the coffin.He had never seen such seen such a big pecker. Well she said "Cut it off as close to his body as you can then put it up his ass". The next day the whole family arrived at the funeral home to pay their respects and the widow knelt down near her departed husband and noticed there was a tear coming down his cheek. She leaned over and whispered in his ear "I told you it hurts".